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The tendency for meetings to expand well beyond their allotted duration without obvious reason.
Read full entry →Attempting to neutralise an offensive statement by announcing it beforehand.
Read full entry →Ending discussion of an avoidable disaster by pretending it was somehow inevitable.
Read full entry →Replacing honest criticism with the safely meaningless word 'interesting'.
Read full entry →An infuriating conversational dead-end where vital gossip is trapped inside a format you cannot physically play without getting fired.
Read full entry →The subconscious but deeply maddening act of weaponizing office stationery to project nervous energy into a quiet room.
Read full entry →A precious, unexpected refund of corporate time that allows an employee to sit in silence and stare out the window.
Read full entry →The desperate, pathetic attempt to inject personality into a soulless corporate check-in by brandishing a confused animal at the webcam.
Read full entry →The malicious, highly effective deployment of a frozen facial expression followed by closing the laptop lid to escape a corporate meeting.
Read full entry →A bold, unapologetic approach to a first date meal that skips any pretence of eating lightly to seem polite.
Read full entry →A meeting labelled as brief and informal that ends up being neither short nor conducted on one's feet.
Read full entry →A rare, seamless video conference completed entirely without technical interruption or audio confusion.
Read full entry →The visually distracting failure of a virtual video background to properly render around a moving person.
Read full entry →An awkward, silent technical failure during a presentation where all forward momentum grinds to an immediate halt.
Read full entry →A meeting title that promises brevity and efficiency but delivers neither, running well over time with no clear purpose.
Read full entry →Blindsided by an unintended text substitution that slipped past a hurried proofread and into a sent professional message.
Read full entry →A recurring, awkward audio collision in a video call caused by lag, where 'no, you go' loops endlessly.
Read full entry →Excessively reliant on corporate jargon phrases like 'circle back' regardless of whether they add any actual clarity.
Read full entry →Compulsively working David Brent lines into unrelated conversation, often to diminishing comic returns.
Read full entry →Producing a small, obligatory laugh out of social duty rather than actual amusement.
Read full entry →Overtaken by inappropriate, uncontrollable amusement in a professional setting requiring total composure.
Read full entry →Someone who nods, says 'absolutely, on it', and vanishes the second the call ends, action items untouched.
Read full entry →A logistical crisis in which a nostalgic meeting spot no longer exists, forcing an awkward last-minute change of plan.
Read full entry →A perfectly timed piece of workplace chaos guaranteed to disrupt exactly the meeting you can least afford to lose.
Read full entry →The dictionary is still being written
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